The People Who Annoy You

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Tue May 09, 2017 10:49 am

Pointlessly Outdated Equipment Guy

The worst golfer I ever played with carried a canvas bag that looked like it was from the Great Depression, full of circa 1950s/60s clubs and not even good ones either, but like the second-rate bargain bin kind. This was back when I still had tolerance for my fellow man, and so I asked him if he ever tried any of the new stuff, you know, make the game considerably more fun. "Nahhhhh" he replies. "I'm terrible no matter what clubs I use, it doesn't make any difference." :facepalm

More recently I got saddled with this hipster doofus, who was kind of on the older end of the hipster spectrum. He had this whole gay ass vintage Ping setup, single-strap carry bag full of Eye2 irons and even the matching persimmon woods. Of course he had to make a fuss over it and tell everyone about how his avid-golfing family members keep bugging him to upgrade but no, "I like the old woods, and I can hit them pretty decent." :facepalm

To make things even more annoying he was a lefty. Funny thing is, there was an oldtimer in our group who's also a lefty, and has some nice modern clubs. Outdated Guy and him get to chatting about equipment, and eventually Outdated Guy gets tempted to try a tee shot using the old guy's 460cc driver. He catches it pretty solid. You should've seen the look on his face, very genuine, very childlike. You could sense the wheels turning in his head after that--this guy is obviously going to make a new equipment purchase very soon.

"I Usually Play Better Than This" Guy

The hipster guy happened to fill an additional role. On this day he struggled, failing to make the usual "3 or 4 pars per side" that he is accustomed to. Mind you, nobody is commenting on his play, nobody gives a shit. But because he had been so chatty about what he perceives as his own ability, maybe he feels compelled to offer us all some explanations. These ranged from hacky swing diagnoses like "Fuck, I lifted up my head!" to course design critiques ("This hole seems poorly designed") and finally to a resigned admission on the 18th tee that "I must be tired, because normally I only play about 12 holes." :nope
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Tue May 09, 2017 11:00 am

So which type of hipster is he? Here is the beginning of my weekly derivatives email 2 weeks ago (written by the guy who I believe is your long lost brother). Which seems oddly pertinent.

In the 2 weeks since this came out, every time I see a hipster I dig deeper to determine which type of hipster they are.

---------------------

If you’re a hipster, is it the worst thing in the world to have clothing you like appear at Urban Outfitters? Let’s say your hipster sphere of influence is t-shirts with an 80s reference, are you happy if Urban starts selling faded blue Rubik’s Cube shirts?

The answer? It depends.

It’s a complicated question with far reaching consequences. As such I think we can all agree that the most obvious means of understanding things is through the complicated lens of a CDO. As I’ve said before, all life question can/should be rendered more unnecessarily opaque using fixing income analogies.

I would like to postulate there is more than one type of hipster, and we can separate the Hipster-class into its key components:

AAA Hipster This is the first-mover, they get first dibs on whatever they please, and move on just as quickly. Generally speaking these are short duration securities/people. In their eyes no good bar can be found on yelp, no good band can be found on iTunes. And you NEVER EVER EVER own a greatest hits album. If you like Duran Duran’s song “Notorious” you have to claim that really their sleeper track “American Science” was really your favorite song from that first album, and that “Notorious” was okaaaay if you’re into that sorta thing.

Mezzanine Tranche Hipster They will generally take what’s available to them. Sometimes they may catch the latest flows from the AAA, but they’re generally a step behind. They like the aesthetic, but they’re not really a driver of trends. It’s kinda like how many people who like the punk-anti-establishment vibe all seem to ironically dress up the same… like they’re in a uniform. Most people are Mezz Tranche hipsters, even though they see themselves as AAA.

Equity Tranche Hipster The Leftovers. These folks just wear whatever is around without really trying too hard. There is no difference between people with truly corny tastes and a hipster. For example my parents’ neighbor isn’t a hipster, he’s just a strange elder Indian man who has a beard and wears velour tracksuits. That’s just Anand Uncle being Anand Uncle.


So the answer to the Urban Outfitters inventory question depends on which tranche of the Hipster security you fall into:

- The AAA Hipster would hate the Rubik’s Shirt development. After all, anything which the masses have easy access to is no longer desirable.
- The Mezz Hipster is pleased with the Urban Outfitter development because the Rubik’s Cube is totally their favorite toy ever even though they’ve never actually played with one longer than 3-4 minutes in the past 25 years. Perhaps there’s an app for this. Moreover Urban is their primary source of hipster cues.
- The Equity Tranche Hipster is pleased because they were just looking for a cheap shirt. If there is a colorful cube on it, so be it.

And therein lies a dynamic which even fixed income can’t discern: In a curious phenomenon AAA hipsters will try to pretend to be Equity tranche hipsters. There is nothing more AAA than exuding a sense of effortless style, which they Equity tranchers stumble into due to a complete lack of awareness. When was the last time you saw a AAA security actively seek to be a lower rated/unrated security? Never.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Tue May 09, 2017 11:04 am

'hipster' is extremely broad, as is 'douchebag'. I tend to think when you call someone either of these such terms, it says more about your feelings about that person than it offers a qualitative description of that person.

Anyways in this case I called him a hipster because he was very precious, as well as ideological, about his vintage bag setup. To me it's a similar impulse behind anything 'artisanal' or 'bespoke' and shit like that.
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Tue May 09, 2017 11:12 am

I'm so sick of things being dubbed "artisanal" that I now refuse to eat anything described that way. F' you panera.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
jattruia
Posts: 428
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2014 2:32 pm
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jattruia » Tue May 09, 2017 11:21 am

Oh, the 'I Usually Play Better Than This Guy' it pretty awful, and i feel your pain. I feel like they could also be called the 'Delusional' guy. In his head, he's CLEARLY 10 strokes better than when you see him. Like the everyone else, he may have the ability to par every hole on the course, but the rest of us know we aren't consistent to par them all in a single round. So in his head, since he CAN par like that, then he expects to.

The 'Martyr To The Rules' guy gets to me too. On a public course, there's no way you're going back to the tee if you lost your ball, just estimate where it went in and take your penalties...it's fine. We get it, you follow the rules, but lets' not let that ruin everyone's round.

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Tue May 09, 2017 12:16 pm

jattruia wrote:The 'Martyr To The Rules' guy gets to me too. On a public course, there's no way you're going back to the tee if you lost your ball, just estimate where it went in and take your penalties...it's fine. We get it, you follow the rules, but lets' not let that ruin everyone's round.
I used to be that guy. Some might say I still am. :gross I've gone back to a tee to re-hit, when nobody's behind and I am driving a cart. I have relaxed since then, but I still like the OB rule. It's harsh but it makes perfect sense, and is arguably a fundamental implication of the basic premise of golf: play the ball is it lies, stroke it until it's in the hole, and by the way you also need to keep the ball on the property.
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
bkuehn1952
Posts: 2197
Joined: Tue Nov 25, 2014 8:08 pm
Location: The Frigid, Sunless Mitten
dogs: 0
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by bkuehn1952 » Tue May 09, 2017 1:06 pm

'I Usually Play Better Than This' Guy seems to be universally reviled. I know the times I play with "him" I feel like ending his misery with a 9 iron to the back of the head. We all have bad days. We all hit embarrassing shots. Fortunately 98% of us don't insist on informing everyone over and over of their misfortune.
Let's Play 36
GHIN Handicap: 7.8 … 9.2 … Let’s just say I am around a 14!

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Tue May 09, 2017 1:15 pm

So if the "I usually play better than this" guy were to not verbalize that he normally plays better would you hate him?

I know when I'm playing bad it will be obvious due to my frustrations and expletives that I dont have my A, or even B game. I don't think I ever have specifically stated I normally play better, but it's obvious due to me saying something like "Jason you're a fucking idiot" right after snap hooking a drive into the lake when there is NO danger to the right.

Now I'm questioning if I fall into the same category as this guy. Even though I really don't like hearing people make that statement.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Tue May 09, 2017 1:46 pm

jasonfish11 wrote:So if the "I usually play better than this" guy were to not verbalize that he normally plays better would you hate him?
Settle down Beavis, it's "the people who annoy you" not "the people you hate", and yes the verbalization is more or less the crux of the annoyance.
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
Duke of Hazards
Posts: 1118
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 2:29 am
Location: Orange, CA
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by Duke of Hazards » Tue May 09, 2017 3:16 pm

Man-bun guy that makes the coffee at the artisanal coffee stand. He' can't be bothered to whisper your name more than once when your Americano is ready and sitting on the counter. Meanwhile, your coffee gets cold. I want Brian's 9 iron for that guy's stupid man bun. Actually make it a majestic 7 wood.
Bluto did it

User avatar
bryan k
Posts: 817
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:07 pm
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by bryan k » Wed May 10, 2017 10:55 pm

Oh, man. I used to so totally be the "I usually play better than this" guy. But I learned the error of my ways because i was also annoyed by that guy. I also began to realize as I played more and more that I could tell the general skill level of a player based on watching him or her swing. And then I began to realize that I really didn't care as long as that player kept a decent pace. That series of revelations was a huge help to my game because it got rid of the "first tee jitters" that most amateurs feel when golfing with strangers.

However, I then moved in the opposite direction. i constantly became the "I totally expect to screw this up" guy. That came to an abrupt halt one day, though, when I was playing my home course with a guy I had never met before. I hit the par 5's green in two for the first and only time ever, but I was a good 100 feet away from the pin. I said out loud, "Yeah, i'll be lucky to three-putt that for par". It was the truth. 100 foot putts are my biggest weakness, and I fully expect to three putt from there. I got off a horrible first putt leaving myself about a 15 footer, and I said "Ha, now watch me three-putt this".

Stranger I had just met said "shut the fuck up and sink the putt."

And proceeded to do just that.

I ended up having one of my better days ever putting the ball, and this guy ragged on me the entire round for what I said on the first hole. I learned my lesson. No matter what I do, I try to act like I've done it before. Because the truth is, good or bad, I probably have done it before. There really is no reason to get upset, and there really is no reason to expect the worst. Just treat every shot like a new game and try to execute it.

Easier said than done.

User avatar
bryan k
Posts: 817
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:07 pm
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by bryan k » Wed May 10, 2017 11:01 pm

People who don't know how to back up their opinions annoy the crap out of me. If you can't back up your opinion, that opinion is completely worthless to me. Sure, everyone has a right to an opinion, but it is a fact that some opinions are simply wrong.

Most of the people who annoy me, though, are on the road. The reason I hate rush hour isn't because I hate waiting for traffic. It's because I fear for my life. I don't understand how completely intelligent and rational people can turn into such idiots when they get behind the wheel of a car. The latest thing that has really begun to get under my nerves is when people try to turn left out of a parking lot into gridlocked traffic when they have no stoplight. Holy shit, dude. Turn right and then make a u-turn. It will be faster for all of us because right now you are blocking three lanes of traffic and the guy in the turn lane just about took you out.

Seriously, I have witnessed three accidents in my life under this exact scenario, and one of them I had to testify in court for. Lady pulled through a gap in three lanes of stopped traffic and got schmucked by a driver in the turning lane because the turning lane wasn't backed up. She tried to fight her ticket in court. What a fucking idiot. The only good news is that my employer paid me for the time I had to spend in court. And then the county sent m a check for like $14 or something stupid. What a waste of time.

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Fri May 12, 2017 9:28 am

http://www.golf.com/tour-news/2017/05/1 ... qualifying

This guy might be the king of all delusional golfers.
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Fri May 12, 2017 10:05 am

So wait don't you also need a 1.4 handicap to sign up for US Open qualifying as a pro? The article made it sound like only amateurs needed a 1.4 handicap.

My guess is the USGA will not allow him to sign up for another one of their qualifiers with out proof of his handicap in tournament conditions. From what I was told shooting 85+ in a qualifier for a high level USGA event will require you to respond to the USGA as to why your score was so high so that they allow you to attempt to qualify for other tournaments.

Edit: Wow I looked it up, anyone that designates themselves as a pro doesn't need to have a specific handicap.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
Duke of Hazards
Posts: 1118
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 2:29 am
Location: Orange, CA
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by Duke of Hazards » Fri May 12, 2017 2:40 pm

That's awesome. Must be some kind of joke, no?
Bluto did it

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Fri May 12, 2017 2:59 pm

They should require all people qualifying have a 1.4 or better.

Imagine being his playing partner and trying to make it to sectionals with some jack ass like that hacking it up next to you. That must throw you off your game. Actually after the turn I would have said something really nasty to him if I were his playing partner and I was sitting on a score of +2 or something where I might actually have a chance at making a come back on the back side if it weren't for the fact I'm having to wait for eternity between shots so this asshole can whack the ball 3 or 4 times.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
DougE
Posts: 1690
Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2014 9:40 pm
Location: Maryland
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by DougE » Fri May 12, 2017 3:43 pm

As far as I know, to attain a PGA Teaching Pro Certification (or whatever it's called), you need to pass a written test and a 2-round Player Ability Test (PAT), which requires you to shoot a specific score (or lower), predetermined by the PGA for the designated course you are taking the test on.

I remember an assistant pro at my old club failing to get his certificate because he shot a 75 or 76 on the day he attempted the 2nd round of the playing test, after shooting a 72 on his first round. He couldn't just go try again either. He had to wait months for a new test date, which was scheduled by the PGA. I am sure I am not getting all the specifics exactly correct, but I do know there is a PGA Teaching Certification playing test and that he had to score somewhere close to par in order to pass.

Once a teaching pro gets his certificate and gets a job, playing golf is something they often have difficulty finding time to do. All the other aspects of running the day to day pro shop operations and outings seem to get in the way. So it would not surprise me to see a club pro who doesn't play enough, shoot scores in the 80s on a regular basis.

To Jfish's point regarding designating yourself a pro, I used to play a few times a year with one "pro" who I could actually beat on a good day. He was around an 8 handicap the last time we played, as he was coming off some shoulder surgery. However, he never got his PGA teaching certificate as described above, but somehow got a job as a head pro at a local course after working as an assistant pro at my old club, and then another. Technically, he was a professional, because he worked in the business, running a proshop and giving lessons, albeit without a PGA stamp of credibility on those lessons. Under tournament conditions, I could definitely see him shooting in the 90s, no problem. Not that he was bad, he just didn't play enough to be super sharp, as is required in an Open Qualifier.

In fact, come to think of it, the head pro at Worthington Manor, where I play now, who IS an A1 PGA Certified Teaching Pro, and has been for over 25 years, played in the U.S. Open qualifier last year which was held at Worthington for the Mid Atlantic Region. He shot 91 or 92 if I remember correctly. But, he is also the General Manager of the club in addition to his head pro duties. He's a busy guy. I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually seen him out playing the course in the two years since I've been there. He probably 3-putted in that qualifier 5 or 6 times. He was also required to play from the tips, which were set up at over 7000 yds. He's in his mid-late 50s and frankly does not have the distance anymore. At least he truly IS a pro. I'm sure, with some time actually playing WM, he could easily shoot in the low-mid-70s from the blue tees. But I digress.

The guy who shot 127 was probably not an A1 Certified PGA teaching pro. At least I hope he wasn't.

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Fri May 12, 2017 3:49 pm

DougE wrote:As far as I know, to attain a PGA Teaching Pro Certification (or whatever it's called), you need to pass a written test and a 2-round Player Ability Test (PAT), which requires you to shoot a specific score (or lower), predetermined by the PGA for the designated course you are taking the test on.
But I don't think (might be wrong) you need your PGA Teaching Pro certification to attempt to qualify for a USGA event as a "pro". You just check the box indicating you are a "pro" (ie you would like to get cash if you actually make the cut). For the PGA Championship yes you have to have your PGA pro cert.
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
jasonfish11
Posts: 2904
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 9:27 pm
Location: Virginia Beach
dogs: 2
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jasonfish11 » Fri May 12, 2017 4:20 pm

DougE wrote:U.S. Open qualifier last year which was held at Worthington for the Mid Atlantic Region.
So if I ever get my crap down to a 1.4 :rofl I can come up there to practice right?
Keep it short stupid.

User avatar
DougE
Posts: 1690
Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2014 9:40 pm
Location: Maryland
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by DougE » Fri May 12, 2017 5:21 pm

jasonfish11 wrote:
DougE wrote:As far as I know, to attain a PGA Teaching Pro Certification (or whatever it's called), you need to pass a written test and a 2-round Player Ability Test (PAT), which requires you to shoot a specific score (or lower), predetermined by the PGA for the designated course you are taking the test on.
But I don't think (might be wrong) you need your PGA Teaching Pro certification to attempt to qualify for a USGA event as a "pro". You just check the box indicating you are a "pro" (ie you would like to get cash if you actually make the cut). For the PGA Championship yes you have to have your PGA pro cert.
Yes, you are correct.

User avatar
jfurr
Posts: 2571
Joined: Tue Nov 25, 2014 10:37 am
Location: South Carolina
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by jfurr » Sat May 13, 2017 4:30 pm

Friend of mine (caddy guy) just went to a US Open qualifier, I need to check in with him how it went...
I'm gonna hit a provisional
HCP Index :facepalm

User avatar
legitimatebeef
Posts: 5113
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:34 pm
Location: island off the coast of america
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by legitimatebeef » Sun May 14, 2017 3:45 pm

bryan k wrote:However, I then moved in the opposite direction. i constantly became the "I totally expect to screw this up" guy.
I've come across that guy too, and I usually have something to say about it. Modest to a fault. While not as annoying as the flip side, the behavior is still rather pointless.

"Hey, great shot!"

"Eh, I'll probably screw up the next one though."

"Now why would you say something like that?" :facepalm
Build a bridge and get over it.

User avatar
DougE
Posts: 1690
Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2014 9:40 pm
Location: Maryland
dogs: 1
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by DougE » Mon May 15, 2017 9:18 am

People who make no effort to pick up the pace, even though they have two open holes in front of them and the group behind who is now waiting on every shot, went off the first tee a half hour after they did.

Or worse, that same group, but after they hole out, while you are standing there waiting on them, one of them goes back to try their putt again. Then casually walks off the green at the slowest pace he can. That's just rude.

Or, the Asian guys who play for big bucks among themselves, and take 15 minutes on every green, marking every putt, reading it from every angle, even from only 18 inches away while a foursome waits out in the fairway, hands on hips, hole after hole. (Not a racist comment. But they do seem to be the worst offenders. I guess it's their culture.)

User avatar
bryan k
Posts: 817
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:07 pm
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by bryan k » Mon May 15, 2017 10:29 am

People who retry their putts annoy the crap out of me. I mean, if there is a pile up on the next tee, by all means...go for it. If you are waiting for me to hole out so you can rehit your putt instead of, say, going to grab the pin, I have zero patience. I will walk off the green at that point leaving the pin lie.

User avatar
srogers13
Posts: 1027
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2014 7:42 pm
Contact:

Re: The People Who Annoy You

Post by srogers13 » Mon May 15, 2017 11:13 am

DougE wrote:Or, the Asian guys who play for big bucks among themselves, and take 15 minutes on every green, marking every putt, reading it from every angle, even from only 18 inches away while a foursome waits out in the fairway, hands on hips, hole after hole. (Not a racist comment. But they do seem to be the worst offenders. I guess it's their culture.)
You forgot that they pay their bets at the end of every hole, too.
I will stand in the fairway, I want to be out of your range.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests